Money And Romance |
Written by: Dame Wotta Tripp
Being Money Smart is also Relationship Smart
Money woes are responsible for more relationship stress than almost anything else. If
your income drops below a certain level, statistics, including some which are accurate, have determined that your
relationship may well be doomed.
While it's certainly true that money talks, unfortunately it's frequently only saying goodbye.
Although it is fashionable to parrot such trite and silly phrases as 'money is the root of all evil', a little
independent thought should reassure most people that this isn't true.
Usually made of metal or paper, it cannot even move on its own without outside assistance, let alone commit
evil deeds under its own power.
Dame Wotta Tripp reassures her readers that it is persons who are the root of most evil, which sprouts freely
across this planet and rather far beyond.
Life on Earth is currently controlled by those who do not have your best interests at heart and it is not designed
to make most of you rich, but rather to grind you down.
Still, it levels the playing field for most people, give or take a few beans, and for those of you with
exceptional creativity, determination and staying power, well, the world can still be your gritty and not quite
You Need Money
To have an existence relatively free of stress, you do need enough money.
That doesn't mean being greedy, but rather it means the ability to meet your bills and obligations with enough
money and resources left over for you and any dependants you may have collected along the way to actually
have a life.
It doesn't seem like a lot to ask of life, and actually it isn't, but there are those whose job it is to make
you feel fortunate that you can eat and guilty for wanting more.
Completely ignore these wanton criminals.
You have rights on this planet of which you are probably not aware, and might find hard to enforce in
any case, but they still exist, and you should feel entitled to earn a proper income and have what you need to
be healthy and well fed.
If you are unwell, you are entitled to an income and proper healthcare.
This, in fact, does not exist, except for the grim parody that masquerades as such, apparently created to
supply amusement to bored sadists in the pay of corrupt governments.
governments are corrupt.
Eternal struggle and vicious stress, often taking place against a
sinister background of constantly having to fill out forms while trying to satisfy voracious and ridiculous
bureaucratic demands, undermines everyone's health and sanity in the end.
Often it crushes individuals and entire families completely and utterly.
In this way the system is a murderer, a cruel and utterly sadistic, legally
sanctioned serial killer that culls humanity at will, completely regardless of the individual.
It's executioners are all the faceless, beige, collective porridge of boring, insensitive and mean government
workers with useless jobs who get paid to complicate things and say no to everything.
So if you and your relationships are going to outlast that kind of pressure, you had all better learn to be
cunning and do a little planning for the future.
Creativity can be a very good thing, especially when it comes to book-keeping.
Where Has All The Money Gone?
I'm sure an intelligent person like yourself has wondered
about this, and quite rightly been a bit puzzled. Where has all the money gone?
A certain amount is printed or minted around the world in individual countries. Once in circulation, a certain
percentage should really continue to circulate.
The proper circulation of money through all levels of society is what creates strong economies and countries
Somebody doesn't want you to flourish!
So where has it gone? It can't all have fallen down grates and disappeared down the backs of
sofas. In fact, money is most notoriously lacking in places that don't have many grates or sofas.
Don't worry, it's safely in the hands of those promoting war, genocide and black-budget operations world-wide,
and also on the Moon, Mars and lately, Saturn.
They are all so busy, inventing dseases, performing human sacrifices, enjoying fine dining, engineering world
disasters and 'terroist' false-flag attacks, playing with their scalar weaponry, teleportation units, time
travel technology and golf clubs, that frankly, they do need all the money, as this all costs
them, or rather everyone else, trillions and trillions of dollars to carry out, each and every
So there is no need to panic, dear readers, as everything is proceeding just as it always has.
How to Avoid Some of the Pitfalls of Getting into Debt
However pleasant this all may be for
those who believe they control the holographic theatre the rest of the world lives and plays within, none of it
solves your own personal money woes.
These problems are of course yours, and yours alone, to cope with.
The way to avoid the dangers of debt lie in organizing your monetary affairs properly, and this means knowing
exactly how much income is coming in, and precisely how
much is going out.
It constantly amazes Wotta Tripp that so many people do not know how much they really make each month, and
furthermore, have no clue how much they are really spending in the same period, or how much they are really in
Worse still, some folk tend to allow the fact they have thrown in their rather shaky lot with another to lull
them into a false sense of security, so they feel that as there are now two incomes, there must be a lot of
savings and therefore more money available to fling around.
How very wrong this frequently proves to be is borne out by the terribly troubled and economically embarrassed
beast that suddenly rears its fearsome head and bites your poor relationship viciously in an exposed and tender
Are you someone who would benefit greatly from educating yourself a little bit more regarding
financial matters and understanding exactly where you stand, and then knowing the steps you need to take to
start putting things right again?
Be On the Same Money Page Together
Communicating with your partner about money matters is
crucial to the success of your relationship.
Laying the ground-rules together before you move in with each other is the best thing you can do to ensure
stress-free navigation of dark and deep financial waters.
You should understand exactly what is expected of you, and what your obligations do and do not include, and the
same goes for your lover.
When you've reached an agreement regarding your mutual resources that is completely satisfactory to both of
you, write it all down, and have both parties sign and date it.
Who's in Debt?
Do you owe a lot of money? Does your partner know? This is not
something to keep quiet about.
Pick a convenient time when you both can be alone and relaxed, tell your lover that you believe honesty is
important (and mean it) and lay all your cards upon the table, however big that table has to be.
Only when you have done this can you work together to find a solution that will satisfy you both.
Not only will it make things better between you later on, but having some emotional support might be a relief,
and two heads are usually much better than one when it comes to finding solutions.
I should note here that there are occasions when this isn't necessarily true, and I'm quite sure that there
are several fools born every minute. I have personally spotted a lot of duds lately, and not one of
them over six months old. Future, beware!
If you are partnered to a selfish, irresponsible person, it might not be quite so simple.
Is your partner almost buried under a mountain of debt? Are they
completely in denial?
This could affect you, too. It's important to establish all the facts, create some ground-rules and a workable
plan, and then stick to it.
If you are already living together, then it should be attended to as soon as possible. If you have not yet
taken that step, then delay it until the financial problems are dealt with.
That way your relationship has a better chance of surviving past the average sell-by date of two to three
Don't Ignore Money Problems
Sometimes people act as though they think that money problems
will go away if they ignore them. Tempting as this attitude might seem, it rarely works out very well.
Love doesn't conquer all on its own. It needs to be tended properly, and part of this task involves working
together to secure some financial stability.
This may seem materialistic, but nothing kills love's young (or old) dream faster than the stress and
insecurities that continual financial problems wash up onto the sands of what should be the pristine shores of
your personal tropical love-island.
What To Do?
The worst thing you could possibly do is to carry on living beyond your means.
Sit down and be prepared to make a few lists, do a little thinking and organize your fiscal world.
Completing the following will help:
• List the total amount of all the income that
comes in during a one-month period
• List all your current debts
• Order copies of your credit rating from the main providers
• Keep a list of all the income that goes out, all your expenditure for the entire month, and this means that
every single penny must be accounted for
, whether you used cash, credit/debit cards
or cheques to pay for your purchases, obligations and services.
Your next job is to figure out how to:
1. Compare the amount you are making with
the amount you are spending. Are you frightened now?
Don't worry, you can still take back the reigns
2. Cut back and see where you can stop spending on luxuries and unnecessary items. Don't buy
you don't need.
3. Stop eating out. Eat fresh healthy food cooked at home. Bonus:
you will be healthier and
your sex life will improve.
4. Take proper responsibility for your finances from now on.
5. Research how you can begin to fix your credit rating if necessary.
6. Start paying your debts off. Arrange for a manageable amount to be paid towards them once a month. Keep
current bills paid up.
7. Put aside an amount every month as savings toward your future.
You might also think of using the following tips to help speed up the process:
Get rid of all luxury services.
• Buy a used car. Think of converting it to run on something other than gasoline.
• Walk or take public transport when you can.
• Shop in thrift stores. You'll be amazed at the treasures you can find for a very few dollars, from
barely-worn designer clothing to champagne glasses, electric juicers and dining room chairs.
.• Advertise goods you no longer need for sale in a buy-and-sell, or have a garage sale to kick-start debt
• Forget about buying more shoes. Forget about purchasing obnoxious, horribly noisy new power-tools.
Forget the Mall. Go for a picnic instead. Visit the library. Have friends round for a pot-luck.
• Make your own beers and wines. It can be great fun, especially when taken up with friends. You can
hold competitions and supply the drinks for the pot-lucks.
• Try and find a way to bring in extra money or get more hours at work. Be creative, but research everything
properly. Think about starting an internet business.
• Avoid constant and expensive visits to cash-points! Plan bank visits in advance, and get out only the amount
of money you have in your planned monthly or weekly budget allowance. Try and get by on just that alone.
If you owe a lot of money it might be wise to look into consolidating your debts and paying one lump sum toward
them each month. This may cost you less in the long run.
Either way, you should go ahead and make proper arrangements to pay them off.
How to Keep Track of Your Money from Now On
You basically only need two folders, one marked
and the other 'OUT'
Put all your records of bill payments, bank records, receipts of purchases, car, rent or mortgage payment
documentation, check stubs and other proofs of expenditure into the 'OUT'
Put all records of money earned or received in any way into the 'IN'
folder. Also keep all bank statements and tax-related
documentation together here in a separate envelope.
This simplifies everything to the level where nobody any longer has any excuse not to take more control and
responsibility over their own money.
If possible, pay your bills on time, and if something goes wrong, tell your partner as soon as
Credit cards are the number one cause of debt.
If you just can't
stop spending too much, then perhaps you should have your credit cards euthanized
and then give them a decent Viking funeral, details of which can be found in the appropriate history books and
on the internet.
You'll be glad you did it once the mourning period is over.
Talk About Purchases First
Don't spend money on major purchases without first discussing it
with your live-in partner.
It's thoughtless and disrespectful to make that kind of decision alone, and if you do so it will probably end
up in a major confrontation, especially if your new prize is something like a Vietnamese pot-bellied
pig or a Harley Davidson.
It would only normally be utilized as a tactic by someone cowardly who wished to artificially create a point of
stress severe enough to potentially bring about the end of the relationship.
If you or your lovers finances are in such a mess that you are worried
about it affecting both of you negatively, then perhaps it's better to keep your independence, and possibly
your good credit rating, by retaining separate bank accounts.
It's a good idea anyway for each partner to have their own savings account, and at least one credit card that
isn't shared. What if something does
go wrong? You do need some independence from each other. You
should be able to survive apart.
Open a joint account so that you and your partner can save together towards special mutual goals, such as
holidays, a down-payment on a home or a possible divorce, while retaining your own account privately and paying
your personal bills through it.
Money and Self-Worth
We are taught from an early age by society itself that people who are
rich are more important than those who are not.
Is this true? Of course
not. Why should it be? Nevertheless, if you aren't yourself wealthy you will
go through life feeling slightly less validated than those who temporarily own vast chunks of change.
If you value love for love itself, don't ever start a relationship that is based on your own or someone else's
bank account balance.
Of course, if love is relatively unimportant to you, and money means almost everything, then go right ahead.
It's probably the nearest you'll ever get to an approximation of personal happiness this time around.
A habit that can become an addiction, you may need to self-discipline
yourself most severely, or have your partner do so if you prefer.
You might even need to seek professional help.
Don't ever treat this dangerous habit like a character quirk or a cute or amusing little failing. It could
become your downfall, or worse.
And while we're on the subject, let us remember that most murders are committed:
• by someone the victim knows
• over money
If for some reason you're simply not able to get a firm financial grip and maintain it, seek expert counselling
before it's too late.
An important part of money management, saving is often a well-meaning but futile
attempt to pad oneself against the coming buffets of future adversities.
Nevertheless it is a worth-while exercise, because occasionally, it does in
At the end of your financial self-evaluation, figure out how much you are able to put aside each month and do
Open a special savings account to keep it in so it will gain interest, unless you prefer to keep it closer to
you. Even a small amount will grow over time.
Start A Little Business
Will you have spare time if you're not shopping quite so much? You
could perhaps get another job to bring in some extra money for luxuries or savings.
Or you could start a little business to work on in the evenings as you sip your home-made wine.
Do you have unusual interests or talents? Have you been nursing a great idea? Now might be the perfect time to
try your fortune and learn how to run a little business successfully.
If you decide to go into business with your spouse, it could well give you a common goal and the investment of
time and effort should bring you closer together.
Make sure you research your target market very well before you begin.
Who knows what it might lead to. Follow your dreams and see if you can bring them to fruition.
Plan to start on a shoe-string budget. This isn't the time to spend a lot more money, so save bigger ideas for
later on. If you find success you'll be able to branch out in the future.
Is it possible to make money through doing business on the internet? It
absolutely is, but you have to know how to go about it.
Many people make a secondary income online. Often they do this by selling things for other people and taking a
Of course, if you have something to sell all of your own, that's even better.
It is relatively easy to create a product or service you can sell. The key is learning how to drive a lot of
targeted traffic through your business website so you can market effectively.
Do you have a useful talent, or extensive knowledge of an unusual subject? Can you produce an eBook of
Are you an artist, musician or writer? Perhaps you can teach? Can you build websites? You might create
hand-knitted windsocks or hair ornaments.
The opportunities are endless. You don't need very much money at all to get started online. Just make
sure to first teach yourself about online marketing, search engine optimization and all other related
areas before you start.
All the necessary information is freely available with a little work. Just avoid getting sucked in by the many
con-artists that lurk like spiders in the shadows of the interweb waiting for 'newbies' to become helplessly
ensnared in their electronic nets.
Don't ever pay for 'business opportunity' information. It will never end well, and you need to teach
yourself, bit by bit, the new skills you will need for success.
Research, brainstorm, research, brainstorm and then research some more!
Books and Classes
It's wise to familiarize yourself with the world of personal finance, and
small business too if it interests you, either alone or as a couple. There are often local courses available,
and people available for business counselling.
Even when kept at home a lot by dependants, and with limited time, a person can find out what
they need to know either at the library or with a little careful internet research, and they don't have to pay
a penny. This is a wonderful benefit that almost anyone can share in if they wish.
There are free books, classes and information all over the place. One day you might even be helping other
people by contributing some of this knowledge freely yourself.
Too Broke To Go On
If for some reason or another you are still unable to make ends
meet, then you might in desperation take the following advice. It is not of the best calibre by any
means, but there is a limit to what can be done for some people:
This will anyway only work if you live in one of the wealthier countries that specializes in pushing other
Simply have your citizenship revoked, move to a third world country and after waiting a while, enter your own
country of origin once again, but this time as an illegal immigrant.
There are many hidden benefits and perks available when you are involved in these type of
Dame Wotta Tripp must stress here that she has nothing at all against illegal immigrants, because she knows the
real truth. This planet is for all of us, but everyone forgot how to share properly a very,
very long time ago.
If you end up in jail because of taking such action, you will at the very least be assured of basic food and
lodging, however sub-standard, and possibly with a computer class thrown in.
And of course, even in the darkest corners, true love has been known to blossom, and one can never be quite
sure when or from where it might suddenly strike.
You should always stay alert and on guard, because this world has the habit of offering to us the strangest
opportunities when we are not expecting them.
So be ready for these opportunities and grab any magical moments they might present to you as soon as they
And remember, you are ultimately limited only by your own thoughts, imagination and creativity.
Wotta Tripp gives sterling advice on managing your finances in a way that will impact your relationship
positively, making it stronger and priming it for continuing success.